![]() ![]() You spank because you believe your child deserves it. Wow, that’s big, isn’t it? If you did NOT see your child as deserving of punishment, you would see no need to spank, would you? If you viewed your child through a compassionate lens, as a tiny person who will make mistakes along the way because he is human, who deserves to be taught in a loving, gentle way, you would never strike him. So we begin to see our child as bad, as deserving of punishment. When we spank our child, we MUST justify it in order to live with ourselves. To deliberately inflict pain on you own child, you have to disconnect from compassion and from empathy.Ģ. Even if you do it “out of love” it is still violence because you are physically striking another human being to deliberately cause them pain. To actually engage in a violent act ourselves is much worse, we must disconnect from our own compassion not only for our child but for anyone. We know, for instance, that watching a violent image reduces our empathy. When a parent hurts her child, the parent has to deaden her natural empathy. Laura Markham, founder of AhaParenting, for her thoughts on this topic. ![]() I turned to my friend and Clinical Psychologist, Dr. It got me to wondering how spanking affects the spanker. There has been a lot of buzz about how spanking affects children.
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